Thursday, 23 October 2008

Old Not-Really-Love Story

This story is specially for my kai-lui, milochel.

So here's a bit more on "something sounding like an extract from a teenage romance novel" from the last post.

So this friend of mine (shall not mention the name, but I don't think you'd be so "blur" not to know, right?) and I were in the same gang that hung out in school. We spend almost every morning before school started and also after school as a bunch of close knit friends. We were crazy about having fun, but serious about helping each other out to be better people as individuals and in the community. (Incidentally, Gadget-daddy was also with us in this gang. Yes, like I said, close-knit friends.)

He and I wrote letters and notes to each other almost every other day, if not every day and we would chat on the phone a lot. We actually got very close because he confided in me about his struggle with parental relationships (he came from a very good home where he felt pressured by parents who are "never wrong").

Eventually we both grew mix feeling for each other.
Through some obvious hints, we let each other know there was a crush on both sides.

He was always kind and encouraging.
He was witty and funny, and sometimes very profound.
The one thing I really appreciated was his respect for me.

It was at this time we both knew I was not ready to be committed in a relationship.
I was afraid.
Afraid that if it failed, I would lose a very good friend.
Afraid that if it failed, I might not survive a broken heart.

So we never actually got "involved" although some people observing us could tell there were some sparks between us.

Eventually he moved to study in another state and we were only in contact once or twice a year.

It was at this time that he was away, that I spent a lot of time with another good friend, now the love of my life (read that real love story here).

So life is such, that some "what if's" would really have ended us up in really different lives from the one we live now.

I am glad for who I am with. Gadget-daddy and I are both so glad.

I am also glad that with him, we are all still very good friends.

I am sure his wife knew about "us" too, as he is the type to not to keep secrets from the one he trusts. So I am glad we are all very good friends.

When we meet we talk about our kids, our parents and siblings. The men talk about financial managements, the wives exchange news about a common friend. We still laugh about some unbelievable incidences we encountered. Occasionally we talk about our funny school tales, but not too much as we do not want his wife to feel left out.

So, we are cool.
Just that having my child carry the same name as he might be a little too close for comfort ...
I'm sure his mom (she knew about "us" too) would raise an eyebrow.


milochel said...

Ohh.. I didn't know that..

U.Lee said...

Hi Moomykin, wow, love this story. I guess lots of us have gone thru similar experiences, ha ha.
And I'm sure "she" can see you and hubby a real loving well it was history....and your hubby too is a good, understanding man.

I too have met men who married my ex-girlfriends, my wife too meeting some....but everyone knows its past and history.
Only very recently met an ex-girlfriend here in Toronto...but just as old friends, thats all...and we then said goodbye for good.
Best wishes to you and hubby...Lee.

little prince's mummy said...

It's great that U can still be very good friends until now~~~~~~ Not easy to hv such nice friend..

JLow said...

Very interesting...

Just before the turn of the millennium there was a lady friend; to go straight to the point, asked if "there was a chance" between us.

Frankly I didn't feel there was any chemistry, only that I enjoyed her company; so much so that friends thought we were an item.

I tried my very best to turn her down nicely. We remained friends, but eventually it just got weird. We didn't see each other much after that, and now she is in Melbourne with a new guy in her life.

Think you guys have handled it well that you are still such close friends.

Moomykin said...


yeah. So now you know.



Oh, I don't think anyone can match up to your number of old love stories. ;)

Have a good weekend.

Moomykin said...

little prince's mummy,


I guess it's because we had all always been good friends and were not actually dating or anything like that, so we can carry on being good friends.



Yeah. I think it's maybe because we never actually said it out, although it was in the air, so we can carry on being friends.

There was once he mentioned something about his family calling a meeting because of this girl in his life, but did not mentioned the name (we knew he was referring to me), but his wife and I looked at each other and I raised my eyebrows at her, as in making it to mean he was referring to her and we all smiled.
Somethings still not said aloud.

Also, I feel safe telling this story here because neither of them read my blog. :) So still safe.

Ann said... is indeed filled with What Ifs...

But God has a plan for all of us!

Moomykin said...


Yes, God has a plan indeed, but it's not like we don't have a choice either.

God is good.